Michael Liimatta

I have often said that the residential recovery program’s first goal is to create hope in our clients. What are some ways we can accomplish this?

Before people can begin the process of change they must fully understand two basic truths; 1) that change is needed in a certain area of their lives and 2) that change is possible.

In previous articles, I have discussed strategies of breaking through the addict’s denial system, which is the starting point for his or her accepting the need for change. But if we only convince people that their lives are a mess we may leave them in a place of despair. We must create an environment full of hope where they can catch a vision for how their lives could be in Christ, along with giving the tools to build a life of faith and recovery.

A. Share the Word — In chapel services and Bible studies with new residents spend time studying scriptures like Jeremiah 29: 11 – “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’” Addicts tend to be “spiritually dysfunctional” and need to gain a clear perspective of God the Father, His character, His power, and His intentions for them.

B. Addiction Education – Gaining more knowledge about addiction serves two very important functions. First, it helps the addict in denial accept his or her condition. Secondly, this knowledge can be a tremendous source of comfort and hope for those struggling with post acute withdrawal symptoms and the emotional difficulties that come with early recovery. Many addicts believe they are “terminally unique.’ — that no one has experienced the same struggles and that their problems are so bad they can’t be fixed. Newly sober addicts need to understand that they are suffering from a malady that is shared by others. Many resources are available: lending libraries, literature, videos, and local professionals who can speak at the mission. Contact AGRM’s Education Office for information on educational resources for use in a mission setting.

C. One-on-One Counseling – Every participant in a long-term program needs at least one hour a week with a staff member who understands addiction to help them through the struggles of early recovery. One very important goal of the first few counseling sessions is to help addicts to work through the toxic shame that them tells them they can’t change. They need to know that God loves them and that His power is available to help them to overcome addiction.

D. Support Groups – Good support groups provide recovering addicts with a safe, non-judgmental setting to share their struggles, thoughts, and feelings without fear of rejection. Hearing the stories of others with similar difficulties and how they overcame them provides valuable encouragement for them to go on in a life of sobriety.

E. Hearing the Stories of Staff Members and Program Graduates – People who are new to our programs need to get acquainted with those who have completed the program and have gone on to lead successful, sober lives. Find ways to get them involved in formal meetings and informal gatherings like alumni picnics. In a similar way, it’s important to give other members of your staff who might not be directly involved with the recovery program a chance to share who they overcame addiction, as well. Both program graduates and staff members who are themselves in recovery stand as living proof that the principles shared in your program really do work!

Sooner or later, every counselor will face the fact that he or she is not able to help everyone who becomes involved with their program. Recovery programs can have a very high turnover rate among their residents. Among rescue mission workers, some have reacted to this situation by becoming discouraged, “burned out,” or even skeptical about the chances of any homeless addict “making it.”

A. Why Professional Distance is Needed – Often, when people first hear the term “professional distance”, they think it means are to be cold, unloving and uninvolved with those we counsel. Actually, it is just the opposite! Over involvement on an emotional level causes counselors to lose their objectivity. They cannot exercise proper judgment in their dealings with those with whom they are seeking to help. Instead, counselors can practice favoritism toward some residents and even end up feeling rejected by them when they don’t respond favorably to their attempts to help them.Mostly, a lack of professional distance is manifested when workers have an improper sense of responsibility for the actions and decisions of their clients. And, it is important to remember that, since so many of those we work with at rescue missions have a background of addiction and codependency, they know how to make others feel guilty about not “taking care of them.”Mission workers must be committed to being part of the solution and not a part of the problem. Their own unresolved issues will inevitably hinder their ability to minister effectively to others.

B. Professional Distance is All About Boundaries – To be a successful counselor in a rescue mission setting, an individual needs good personal boundaries. This means allowing residents to be responsible for their own decisions and actions – and allowing them to experience the consequences fully. My job is not to fix you. My job is to share what I found out and you can either take it or leave it. Whatever you do with what I’m sharing with you is your choice. I’m not going to own any of that for myself. It’s being able to leave residents and their problems at the mission when we go home at night.

C. Professional Distance Means Knowing When to “Let Go” – In over twenty years of working with troubled people, I have found that there are basically just two reasons:

• They are not a ready for the help we have to offer
• They have problems we are not equipped to handle

At times, people may have more problems than a mission’s facility and staff is equipped to handle. This can be especially true when we encounter individuals with severe mental problems. For them, the most loving direction is certainly a good referral to a place where the help they need can be found. So, staff members need to know; a) what resources are available in-house, and b) resources are available to meet residents’ needs in the community outside of the rescue mission.

On the other hand, there are people who simply are not ready for what we have to offer. With mission program participants this usually shows up in the form of resistance. One manifestation of resistance is a refusal to abide by expectations and rules to which they initially agreed when they first entered your facility or program. Using alcohol and/or drugs while in the program is another form of resistance. Keeping such people around can be both bad for them and unfair to those who do have a sincere desire for a new life.

Certainly, troubled people need a lot of love and compassion. Yet on the other hand, like Jesus, rescue mission staff members do need, at times, to confront people who are in sin and denial. Truth is always uncomfortable to the hard-hearted. People continue to abuse alcohol and drugs (and persist in dysfunctional behaviors) as long as they feel the benefits outweigh the costs. While it can be extremely difficult to dismiss certain people from a program, we really are doing what is best for them. For those in denial about their problems, consequences can be their salvation! People only recover from addiction when they learn to take responsibility (with God’s help) for their own actions and lives. We cannot do this for them!