Who Needs Recovery?

You probably need to consider seeking help if:

  • The last thing in the world you want to do is talk about your possible areas of “stuckness.”
  • Your life is getting to be a repeat of one disaster after another.
  • You are finding you feel less and less in control over problems you once thought were under control.
  • You have noticed an increase in the frequency of the behaviors that you believe are a problem (lying, stealing, drinking, eating, gambling, etc.)
  • You have family members that have begun to show concern about problem areas in your life.
  • You feel that you are getting more of the things that you don’t want and less of the things you do want.
  • You have unresolved issues from your past that periodically resurface, much to your discomfort.

— Tim Timmons from his tape set “AA means Anyone Anonymous”

Admitting Powerless – a Defeatist Attitude?

powerlessnessIsn’t   admitting “powerlessness” over drugs and alcohol a defeatist attitude?

At first glance, declaring that one is powerlessnesss over alcohol sounds like a sad resignation to a lifetime of battling with the urge to drink.   Fortunately, the truth is just the opposite.   Both clinically and spiritually, this admission is the key to a lifetime of victory for the struggling addict.

A.         What “powerlessness” is not — Because there have been are some misapplications of this concept, we need to recognize that   the concept of powerlessness has nothing to do with:

  • Which drug or type of alcohol an individual uses.
  • How often or how much he or she drinks or takes drugs.
  • The will power to stay from taking a drink or ingesting drugs.
  • The determination to stay away from drinking friends, the liquor store, crack house or any other place he or she   and drink or finds drugs.

These are all choices that are within the addict’s ability to control — and for which they must be held responsible.

B.         What “powerlessness” is — The type of   “powerlessness” we are focusing on what happens when the addict uses his/her drug of choice (which may be ethyl alcohol).   In the beginning, anyone who starts using drugs or drinking alcohol has a lot of control over their using experiences.   They means they can still decision hen they will use, how much they will use, and when they will stop.   However, once an addiction progresses to the chronic stage, they lose the ability to predicate any of this.

C.         Loss of Control: the Hallmark of Addiction —   Some alcoholics have told me that they can’t be powerless because they can just stop for one or two beers and go home without it turning into a prolonged binge.   For them, I like to use the illustration of playing Russian roulette.   Just as every chamber of a gun does not contain a bullet, not every using experience ends up in days of out-of-control use and behavior.   Some alcoholics switch from beer to wine to hard liqour in hopes of gaining control over alcohol in one form or another. Others actually get into exercize, change their eating habits, lose weight, or even stop spending time with certain acquaintances in order to get a better handle on their use. Eventually, addicts will find themselves out-of-control while under the influence. When an addiction has progressed to the point of the loss of control, it is a “point of no return.”

D.       “The Illusion of Controlled Use” — This notion is at the very bottom of the addict’s denial system.   Some may be willing a admit that they “have a problem with alcohol” or that they “drink too much.” But, real recovery only begins when they are fully able to accept that they have totally lost the ability to control their alcohol or drug use once they start.   Destroying this illusion, forever,   is one of the most important tasks to complete in a recovery program.   If this does not happen, all the addict learns and experiences in the program will not be enough to keep him or her sober for very long.   If drinking or drugging again is even a remote option, they will eventual do it.

E.         A Personal Word – I am a Spirit-filled born-again Christian.   But I know in my “heart of hearts” that if, today, I were to introduce chemicals into my body, I would have no idea where I would end up.   This sure knowledge of my powerlessness over alcohol and drugs keeps me from gambling with my soul and my eternal destiny.   Just like any other alcoholic or drug addiction, the victory for me is won or lost over the first drink.     I am convinced that taking it would launch me into a dizzying, downward spiral and only God knows how or if I would ever emerge from it.

F.         Powerless: the Key to Spiritual Power — In 1 Cor 6:12, Paul makes an interesting statement, “Everything is permissible for me—but I will not be mastered by anything.” A true sense of powerlessness enables the addict so see that he or she will not overcome addiction simply through force of will.   Success will only be found by looking outside of themselves for the power to change.   This relates very much to the words of Paual in 2 Cor. 12: 9 & 10.   Paul said he would rather boast about his weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on him and that God’s power is “made perfect in weakness.”

G.       The First Step Exercise — This is an effective group exercise to help addicts grasp their own personal powerlessness over their drug of choice.   To begin, ask members to create a list of twenty examples of life experiences that illustrate how they   are powerless over their “dug of choice.” Then, have them share their lists with the group to get their feedback.   The counselor leading the group must be prepared to hear lots of excuses and blameshifting.   So, he or she must be prepared to keep the focus on the individual, their use, and the real life events that following the use of alcohol and drugs.   With the help of the counselor and their peers, the goal is to help progrm participants gain enough self-insight to see that only one thing led to their hardships; the use of alcohol and/or drugs.   Take this factor out of the equation and none of the rest would have followed.

 

Women and Addiction (Part 2)

In our previous installment, we introduced the July 2002 Caron Foundation report, “Women & Addiction: Gender Issues in Abuse and Treatment.”   In discussing the first part of this report, we paid particular attention to the some of the trends related to addiction among women and some of the reasons women become addicted.   Now we will turn to what the researchers have learned about women and addiction treatment and explore some of the challenges they face in getting help to overcome addiction.

A.         Limited Access to Services — The Caron Foundation study found that only about one third of women who want addiction treatment are able to get it.   We face a time of great cutbacks in the willingness of insurance companies to pay for treatment services.   Even those who do cover it, rarely pay for more than two weeks of inpatient programs.   Meanwhile, for those without insurance, most government-sponsored programs have long waiting lists that discourage most from seeking the help they need.

B.         Gender Differences in Attitudes Toward Treatment – Men are more likely than women to become involved with treatment for addiction. This is partly because men are more likely to experience legal problems or trouble on the job because of their drinking or drug use.   As a result, the focus for the need of treatment and counseling tends to be on the male adult in the family.   Meanwhile, the addiction of the female adult family member may not be detected.   Women usually do most of their drinking and drug use in private, so their problems may not be as immediately apparent.   For a variety of reasons, women have a very difficult time when it comes to admitting an addition problem.   They are more likely to look to a mental health profession, instead of an addictions counselor, to deal with problems in their lives.   Admitting to addiction is sometimes considered more shameful for women than it is for men.

C.         How Relationships Affect a Woman’s Decision to Seek Help —Women function in the context of a complex web of relationships that includes both their male partners, their children, and their parents and siblings.   For instance, women addicts are more likely to receive the money they use for alcohol and drugs from their parents than are men.   There is a real tendency for family members to protect and make excuses for the female addict.   It is interesting to note that women are usually more supportive of their men seeking treatment, while men are usually not as likely to be supportive of female partners seeking treatment.   This is an important point, since many of the female addicts seeking help at rescue missions probably will have a male partner out there who is actively discouraging them from seeking help.

D.       Issues Related to Children – Fear of losing their children is often a reason many women do not want to admit to having an addiction problem.   This same fear can be a very significant motivation for completing treatment and seeking a life of sobriety.   Residential programs that allow female addicts to have their children remain with them while in treatment have much higher rate of success than programs that do not provide living arrangements for children.   One study found that six months after completing a treatment program, women assigned to live with their children were more likely than the other women to report abstinence from drugs and alcohol, involvement in aftercare or support groups, employment, custody of children, and no arrests or incarceration. An important ministry for rescue missions is providing supportive family-oriented housing for women while they participate in either an in-house or outpatient treatment program.

E.         Gender Specific Programs     Recent studies confirm what rescue missions have known all along; women do better in treatment programs that are gender specific.   In mixed gender programs, women tend to take a “back seat” to the men and are less likely to share their own struggles.   Additionally, the research shows that female addicts do better with female counselors.   This is especially true for counselors from whom they sense a great deal of caring and those with whom they have developed a significant level of trust.

F.         Specialized Services for Women — To be successful with addicted women, a variety of specialized services are needed.   These may include:

  •        Food, clothing and shelter
  •        Transportation to treatment
  •        Child care during treatment
  •        Job counseling and training
  •        Legal assistance
  •        Literacy training and other educational skills
  •        Parenting skills training
  •        Family and couples therapy
  •        Medical care and family planning services
  •        Social support services
  •        Psychiatric assessment and mental health services

While most rescue missions are not able to offer all of these programs in-house, they can accomplish this by developing a good referral network and bringing in resources from the local community.

 

“Women & Addiction: Gender Issues in Abuse and Treatment “is available online at:

https://www.caron.org/pdf/Wmn&Addctn-GenderIssues.pdf.

 

See Women and Addiction Part 1